Sunrise on Mt Siani, oil on canvas, 20x24
The climb started in the middle of the night, intending to get to the top to watch the sunrise. I wasn’t sure I could make the steep climb, so I hired a camel to take me halfway up. I was frustrated that my fears kept me from the other hikers, but in the end, I was so grateful I had chosen this passage. The sky was alive with countless stars above me. The hikers needed flashlights to guide their feet from falling on the steep climb, but on the back of a camel, no flashlight was needed (In fact, we weren’t allowed to turn them on because it scared the camels). Being on my camel afforded me to look up and see the magnificence of God displayed in the heavens above. The darkness veiled everything around me ( and my camel, much to my alarm at first, passed the others to take the lead), so I felt truly alone with God as I ascended Mt Sinai. In this place, God delivered the Ten Commandments to Moses and whispered to Elijah after he fled there in fear and anger.
Whenever I read Elijah’s story (1 Kings 19), I weep over God’s tenderness toward him. God asked him, “Elijah, what are you doing here?” and Elijah was honest and poured out what was in his heart - he was angry, tired, and depressed. And then... “The LORD said, ‘Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.‘ Then a great powerful wind tore apart and shattered rocks, but the LORD wasn’t in the wind. After the wind, there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire, and after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it (the gentle whisper), he covered his face and stepped out to meet God.” (1 Kings19:11-13).
I’ve often asked God, “What were the words You whispered?” The scripture doesn’t say. But I imagine God spoke Elijah’s name with a tender tone of love, signaling that He was passing by. That gentle whisper wiped away Elijah’s fear, affording him the courage to step out to meet God!
I wanted to hear God's whisper, too, at the top of Mount Sinai, just like Elijah. But God didn’t wait until I got up to the top, nor do I think I would have heard his voice up there had He waited because as the sun rose, I was surrounded by others.
While riding my camel up the mountain, I started making up a little tune to accompany a Bible verse I had memorized long ago.
“Let the beloved of the Lord rest secure in Him
for He shields him all day long
and the one whom the Lord loves
rests between His shoulders.”
Deuteronomy 33:12
Rests, secure, shields, loves, shoulders…tender words I sang repeatedly, with grateful tears streaming down my cheeks. Filled with wonderment, I, too, internally heard God whispering my name with love.
Sometimes, I don’t approach God for fear He might scold me. I’ve avoided Him other times because I imagine He must be angry with me. When “earthquakes“ come into my life, I wonder if God punishes me for something I did wrong. But I’ve come to believe that God is not in the “winds, earthquakes, or destructive fires” of life. I believe He calls us all by name with a gentle whisper of love. The "fire" of bitterness, shame, and anger can keep me in the past, and the loud wind of fear can lock my eyes on the future, but when I ask God to still me in the present, He whispers, “Come,” calling me by name.
I’m learning that I don’t have to climb Mount Sinai to witness the sunrise to see or hear from God. I believe He has been whispering my name and yours all along…we only need to be still and listen.
“He counts the stars and calls them all by name. How great is our Lord! His power is absolute! His understanding is beyond comprehension.”
Psalm 147:4–5 (NLT)
"I will give you treasures of darkness and riches stored in secret places so that you may know that I am the Lord who summons you, I name."
Isaiah 45:3–4. (NIV)
Powerful and beautiful. Wow.